ciceroZ's Xanga

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Wed, 14 Nov 2007 22:55:49 GMT

OK, I found another website with funny tee shirts.

This is another one that I found to be really funny only because I used to "read" this character's books like every single day in fourth grade or something.

don't worry, no swear words this time:

LINK HERE

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Tue, 06 Nov 2007 00:17:08 GMT

The website BUSTED TEES - you ever go there? It has funny t-shirts, some of them are really really dumb, but a good bunch of them are very clever with you-have-to-be-somewhat-smart-to-get-these-jokes jokes and jokes that only kids from t he 1980s would get, so that's right up my alley!

here is one that made me laugh for a very long time, cuz it really is just so true

<<WARNING - there is foul language on this!!!>> so don't look at it if you are not prepared - but please remember that I did not come up with this design (I'm not smart enough) I just stumbled upon it.....
LINK HERE

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Thu, 25 Oct 2007 01:06:43 GMT

whoa it's been almost 3 months since i've touched this thing, wow does anyone even use Xanga anymore? If you do, let me know - well let's test it out with a post about some recent funny happenings:

Terence is standing outside with us at the International Buffet - holding the door open for us as we leave:

Random American Costumer: Oh are you guys closing already
Terence: Uhhh, I don't work here
Jon: ROFL
Random American Costumer: Oh Sorry

Ah I love accidental racism

School dialouge:
-wait are any of you part Asian?
+I am, can't you tell from my eyes?! <<eyes not that slanty by the way>>
-oh really, which part of Asian?
+I'm part Mongolian
-oh who was Mongolian? Grandpa?
+um, my ancestors were actually *&#^$) by Mongolians
-hey I know what you mean, that's exactly why my ancestors built a 2000 mile long wall to keep them out!

Sunday, August 05, 2007

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 12:30:54 GMT

<<WARNING - spoilers ahead>>

not like you didn't already finish the book right? So I finished the new Harry Potter last night (I think the book really needs a different title too), I would have finished a few days earlier, but I had something called a 12 page final paper due, so that kinda killed the time, haha.

This last book seemed kind of rushed. First of all I was wondering if Rowling had everything planned from the start, all the things that she referred to in the past, although I guess most of it were references from just book 6, so I guess it's not too hard to plan 1 book in advance, but if she had planned stuff all the way back from book 1, then whoa, great job, but I really doubt it. Like did she always want to make Snape the "good" guy and not reveal it until the bitter end? eh..., I dunno, the whole thing how he actually cared for Harry's mom? ehh....sounded a bit too like cheesy weak sauce for me. Maybe some of the could have been left out and a prequel should be written instead....ooooo.

Yeah so it was kinda dopey (too much like "oh now let's have a conversation between the characters and they will ask questions as if you were asking them and explain everything!), kinda predictable, but after all I guess it is for kids, and they can't figure out too much stuff...Although I did like the last battle of course, especially when all the old buddies started showing up, like Percy, but come one, expand on that character's restoration! And I love McGonagall, she's a bad BEEP, and Luna, they should make a book just about her, hahaSo I didn't get too badly spoiled on this one, not like #4 where I stupidly spoiled myself on the internet, or book #6 where a kid spoiled it for me "accidently" literally 10 seconds after I told everyone not to spoil it.....but again, nothing beats book #3 for me, I hadn't seen the movie at the time, I had read any spoilers or heard anything, it was like best book evah! (go back and read my entries about HP from summer '06 or summer '05)

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 01:48:25 GMT

My two little cousins are here now in NJ, it's kinda weird because they don't really know each other since one is on my mom's side and the other from my dad's side, but what's ironic is that their older siblings were both in the same position when they both came to visit us here in NJ back in 1998, how history repeats itself....it's always fun when little cousins are here because I've never had any younger siblings, so I get my turn at the pleasure of terrorizing little kids, now I know how my older brother must have felt every day with me. The favorite thing to do for them is play video games, which basically consists of me playing the dumb games while they watch and cheer.....typical....this is also their first time in America, so of course we want them to soak everything in, but of course after a long day of tours in NYC or DC, all they want to do is come back home and jump on my bed....go figure...

Today we salute you Mr. Kiss me I'm Irish Pin Wearer
(Mr. Kiss me I'm Irish Pin Wearer)
What would St. Patricks Day be without the rich Irish tradition of wearing a pin to beg girls to make out with you.
(The luck of the Irish)
Your cousin's, granfather's, uncle's gardner was Irish, which gives you the right the solicit affection from strangers.
(Who do you think you're fooling?)
Few men are brave enough to use a bad pickup line, only you are brave enough to say it, put it in writing, and wear it on your chest.
(Look at ME!)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light Mr Patty's Day pickup artist
You have high standands when it come to women, anyone who can read

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Tue, 10 Jul 2007 17:36:15 GMT

For some reason, even when it's super hot outside, like today, I still like to take warm showers.....

So who watched Transformers. I heard that it got good reviews, but after watching the movie I was like "OK, who wrote the good review?" So I went online to look and most reviewers gave it a B or B-, um, that's not THAT good....Well for one, it was not too long, so I won't go into my whole wasted-my-life rant for this movie. And the effects were good, but effects in tons of movies are good these days. OK, and that's about it. There were no common themes, it kept jumping from robots beating the heck out of each other to stupid teenagers pretending to know things about computers to slapstick comedy, to out of character facial expressions and lines, the plot was pretty weak and lame and full of inconsistencies and parts that didnt make sense and pointless (that's the problem with sci-fi movies, your mind allows for a certain amount of fantasy, but it has to make sense and somewhat follow logic.....usually these movies leave way too many gaps.....), the acting was by a bunch of high school level clowns....now of course it follows the old cartoons and you had to be a fan, but hey, I was a fan, I watched all the time, and I had lots of the toys, metroplex, omega supreme, blitzwing, the 5 construction dudes, and more! and I guess it was cool in that regard, but the movie as a whole will just get swept by the wayside of my summer senseless movie memory.....sorry tae-mon....but I still have a load of respect for your 80 sets of transformers in your room....p.s. didnt it come out july 3? then why do the posters say july 4?

So I found out that people actually still read this stuff (by the way I did not make any of it up, they are all actual radio commercials....), so I'm going to be more diligent in posting these frequently. During the fall we always run in Central Park and we see these guys everywhere! And they really do smell! Nothing is worse than a grueling 3rd mile of hard running while inhaling 20 liters of dung-filled air....nasty....

Today we salute you, Mr. Horse-Drawn Carriage Driver.
(Mr. Horse-Drawn Carriage Driver)
You start your day with a "tip tip" and a "cheerio" which is odd because you're from Brooklyn.
(Jolly old Brooklyn!)
While most people sit behind a desk, you proudly sit two feet behind a four-legged manure factory.
(uugghh!)
No one knows the guts it takes to ride the subway to work dressed as a foppish dandy from the 18th century.
(He's a foppish dandy)
Blaring horns, profanity, vicious insults - all met with a courtly tip of your stovepipe hat.
(Cheerio!)
So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light, buggy boy, because the way you say "giddyup" makes us say "whoa"!
(whoa whoa whoa)

Friday, July 06, 2007

Fri, 06 Jul 2007 20:30:58 GMT

I think I'm getting old because on Wednesday we went to Six Flags Great Adventure and when I was a kid I clearly recall doing the rides like Rolling Thunder or Scream Machine 6 or 7 times in a row with much enthusiasm and joy, but this time after one ride I was like, "OK, let's call it a day."

I've seen contruction every day outside our school building for the past year - so this reminds me of it:

today we salute you, mr. wrecking ball operator
(mr. wrecking ball operator)
you do what lesser man can only dream about. you smash great big things into little bitty pieces
(totally awesome)
forty-two stories of brick, mortar, and iron? no problem. you'll have it down by lunch
(bring it all down)
some might say your job is easy, but never to your face. why? cuz you'll come up swinging... a two thousand pound ball
(ooh yea!)
so crack open an ice cold bud light wrecking man, because anyone can build a building, but it takes a man with one giant ball to bring it down.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 02:16:05 GMT

So school is out and summer has officially begun for everyone. This is a tribute to the great American tradition of the backyard BBQ. And plus the chem-teacher inside me loves this one (KABOOM!)

This Memorial Day we salute you Mr. Gasoline BBQ Starter
(Mr. Gasoline BBQ Starter)
Never mind charcoal chimneys, and easy lighting briquettes. The only way to start a real BBQ is with a gallon of 93 octane and a big book of matches
(Light up the sky)
Who needs eyebrows? You're hungry and you've got 7 pounds of lamb shanks ready to go
(That's a lot of kabobs)
You don't just defy convention, you defy warning labels, and common sense
(Very low I.Q.)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light O' Prince of the Pyrotechnic, because no one makes a backyard mushroom cloud like you do

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Tue, 12 Jun 2007 02:22:18 GMT

-Today is that last Monday of our Junior year!
+unless next year you have 40 more Mondays of Junior year all over again!

For some reason I have a shirt that says "silent but deadly"
like why am I known as the SBD guy? It happens a lot more to other people I promise....

Today we salute you
Mr. Silent killer gas passer (Mr. Silent killer gas passer)
Last night, you had the enchilada combo platter
This morning, the three-cheese omelet with broccoli
This afternoon, you're a ticking time-bomb
(tick, tick, tick, tick)
Because of you a simple elevator ride is suddenly a
42-floor plummet into the very bowels of hell
(You take my breath away)
Who did it? Who cares.
Sweet mercy, please, just someone light a match
(sweet, sweet mercy)
So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light O ninja of the nasty
And while you're at it, crack open a window

Monday, June 04, 2007

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 02:03:42 GMT

Last week a bunch of the students were getting unfocused, so I just about had it with them:

+If anyone wants to just talk to your friends all period, be my guest. Leave the class and stay out and talk all your want. I'll give you a "D" for the rest of the year and at least you won't be disturbing the class.
-Really?
+Well, except for you because a "D" would actually bring your grade up.....

OK, new radio commercial:

Today we salute you, Mr. Airline Meal Chef.
(Mr. Airline Meal Chef)
Nothing relaxes a diner like a pleasant discussion of safety procedures should the restaurant suddenly fall out of the sky.
(Oh nooooooooo!)
Chicken or beef, chicken or beef? Chicken? We're out, here's the beef.
(Still tastes like chicken)
Who ordered the heart healthy meal? Probably not the guy who ordered the seatbelt extender.
(Excess Baggage)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, O' Sultan of the Salisbury. Even though we are crammed in coach, our meals are first-class.